Category Archives: Characters

King Joffrey is the only well-written character in Game of Thrones.

King Joffrey: The Only Well-Written Character in Game of Thrones

Thus far, I’ve written a number of articles on George R. R. Martin’s horrendously boring A Song of Ice and Fire series.  Among these were two in which I analyzed some of the many poorly-written shells that pass for characters in Martin’s world.  In this article, however, I will discuss the villain of the first few volumes, King Joffrey.  Joffrey is the only well-written character in A Song of Ice and Fire, mostly because he’s the only character who’s internally consistent.
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The Mane 6 confront Discord.

How My Little Pony Became Great

The Mane 6 wearing the Elements of Harmony.My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic is my favourite show of the decade.  I don’t think anyone expected when the first generation of My Little Pony aired in the ‘80s that it would eventually become a great show, but miraculously it managed it, proving that good writing can accomplish anything.  In this article, I intend to examine briefly the three generations that preceded Friendship is Magic, and then I’ll move on to why Friendship is Magic is the amazing show that it is.
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Stannis Baratheon arrives at The Wall on his horse.

Stannis Baratheon: Another One-Note Asshole

Stannis Baratheon, a character in Game of ThronesIn my last article concerning A Song of Ice and Fire, I discussed a character called Jon Snow.  He was, as are all George R. R. Martin’s characters, incredibly bland and unpleasant.  Although they’re all basically the same character, there are more of the same character to tear apart in these articles, so let’s get started with Stannis Baratheon.
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Alien Force's bastardized version of Ben Tennyson

“Ben 10: Alien Force” Review

After tackling a sensitive topic in my last review, I decided to finish work on what amounts more to a rant.  You see, the original Ben 10 was a great show.  It ended, I think, on a high note; I never wanted a bloody sequel—we got one, though.  Ben 10: Alien Force is one of the worst spin-offs I’ve ever seen; despite not being as terrible as the likes of “Teen Titans Go,” Alien Force still fails at nearly everything.  Basic character development, emotions, action, and so many other elements seem to be beyond the scope of Alien Force.  Eight or ten episodes in (if I remember correctly) and I was bloody done.
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Zoro holding a sword in each hand and one in his mouth.

Sexism in One Piece

There’s nothing more certain to draw masses of ire than the criticism of a well-liked show.  That said, I don’t really have much choice in the matter, as I could not ignore such blatant sexism as one finds in the nineteenth episode of the show One Piece.Zoro holding a sword in each hand and one in his mouth.  First of all, I have heard that the show gets better after this, so if this is the case, please consider this to be a criticism of Episode Nineteen only.  I don’t think that’s entirely unreasonable, as this episode functions more-or-less as a standalone story; for the purposes of this review I will regard it as such.
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Jon Snow, a character in Game of Thrones

Jon Snow: The Boring Bastard

“What’s wrong with the characters in A Song of Ice and Fire,” you ask?  Well, let’s just take a look.  As for what’s wrong, where do I begin?  Why don’t I start with the fact that they’re all basically the same character?  You can’t really expect any better when an author divides his attention among a thousand of them, which is why you need to limit the number of pivotal characters in a story.  Every character in the story has, at most, a few personality traits to differentiate it from the cookie-cutter template that Martin applies to the lot of them.

I plan on suffering through several more of these character analyses, but I’ll start with the ever-tedious Jon Snow.  No, I’m not talking about Dr. John Snow, the Victorian physician who discovered that drinking polluted water was a bad thing—oh, I only wish!  Jon Snow is, amazingly, one of the least irritating of Martin’s characters.  I shudder to think of analyzing any of the others, but that’s Future Hamish’s problem!
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Bella Swan looking particularly cold.

Bella Swan: Sociopath or Psychopath?

As you’ve probably guessed if you’ve ever thought about it, the silent “p” in “psychopath” isn’t there just to confuse; the Ancient Greek letter “ψ” (called Ψι) represents the sound /ps/, which is used in the word “ψυχή,” which meant “soul” and was pronounced /pʰsyː.kʰɛ᷄ː/. “Psychopath” is derived from “ψυχή” and “πάθος” (suffering), and like many greek loanwords, the latin alphabet renders “ψ” as “ps.” I assume since /ps/ isn’t an especially easy way for non-greeks to begin a word, it therefore became just /s/ in other languages.
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The main cast of the horrible television show Brickleberry

Brickleberry: How Can Anyone Like This Show?

I’d heard this cartoon was bad.  I’d heard it was just another stupid adult cartoon trying to pander to the same audience as Allen Gregory, Mr. Pickles, or King Star King.  Having actually watched it, I can honestly say that Brickleberry makes Allen Gregory look like Rick and Morty in terms of quality!
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A Game of Thrones Review: “A Little Adrift”

I had intended to touch upon this in my actual review of Chapter 16, but it slipped my mind when I actually sat down to write the review.  In case anyone needs further evidence in support of my claim that the direwolf’s slaughter had almost no effect on the characters, I found a quote by the author about just that while making sure I hadn’t misremembered anything.
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Johnny sniffs his ex-fiancée's red dress.

Defining a Mary Sue

Now, I think people have a tendency to apply the term “Mary-Sue” to just about any character they dislike or find irritating.  A common summary of what constitutes a “Mary-Sue” is simply that a character is perfect, idealized, has no faults, or always does the right thing; I fervently believe this definition to be quite inaccurate.

For me, whether one is a Mary-Sue is not a question of perfection but one of accountability.  Sex also plays a substantial role in the equation.  To put it most simply, a Mary-Sue is a character who acts merely as a vessel through whom the author may live out their—often sexual—fantasies.
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