In my previous article, I talked about a film called In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale. In case you didn’t read that review, the film is by the infamous Uwe Boll, and it’s high fantasy at its very worst. Upon finishing that abomination, Boll must have realized that there remained at least a very few of the genre’s worst writing practices that he’d not had time for in the original. Sadly for everyone concerned, good old Uwe decided to make two sequels just so he could squeeze in more of the worst things a fantasy writer can do.
Continue reading “In the Name of the King 2: Two Worlds” Review
“Look; I am not a fucking retard like Michael Bay!”Uwe Boll
As adept a judge of character as the above quote would suggest him to be, Uwe Boll’s body of work is at least as bad as anything I’ve seen from Michael Bay. My article today concerns Boll’s attempt at a high fantasy epic. Like most of his work, In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale is based on a video-game. I read a bit about the story of the game, and the movie seems to have nothing to do with it. Most reviews of In the Name of the King dub it one of the worst fantasy stories of all time, but I recently reviewed The Dragon in the Sock Drawer, which was so stupid and utterly mental that In the Name of the King seems all the more bland.
Continue reading “In the Name of the King” Review
Now, I think people have a tendency to apply the term “Mary-Sue” to just about any character they dislike or find irritating. A common summary of what constitutes a “Mary-Sue” is simply that a character is perfect, idealized, has no faults, or always does the right thing; I fervently believe this definition to be quite inaccurate.
For me, whether one is a Mary-Sue is not a question of perfection but one of accountability. Sex also plays a substantial role in the equation. To put it most simply, a Mary-Sue is a character who acts merely as a vessel through whom the author may live out their—often sexual—fantasies.
Continue reading Defining a Mary Sue
After looking at the first chapter of George R. R. Martin’s abhorrent A Song of Ice and Fire series, it almost goes without saying that we should, without warning, jump fifteen chapters ahead to one of the very worst this series has to offer, doesn’t it? Therefore I will jump straight to reviewing the chapter that should have made me quit reading this awful series.
Continue reading A Game of Thrones Review: One Dead Direwolf and a Whole Cast of Unlikable Characters